How do you wipe your backside?

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randomsquid
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#16 Post by randomsquid » Sat Nov 24, 2012 2:48 pm

Fucking hell. Hope you feel human soon mate.

As for the original question, when I was a bit immobile I found washing by the sink, light towelling and a bit of talc was the least aggro.

And I'd buy a new helmet, that lash up with the foam and bandages doesn't look practical.
Where ever I lay my hat.....

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slickliner6
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#17 Post by slickliner6 » Sat Nov 24, 2012 3:00 pm

that aint good mate,hopefully be mended soon.

But on a positive note......Thats one hell of a MO TASH you got going on.

del
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we were so poor when i was growing up.Dad said "its a good job i was born a boy,at least id have something to play with" ;-)

fatboy
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#18 Post by fatboy » Sat Nov 24, 2012 6:35 pm

OUCH ! Best wishes with it all dude, take it easy and mend soon
Cleverly disguised as an adult !

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Falcopops
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#19 Post by Falcopops » Mon Nov 26, 2012 1:39 am

Kin ell mate, that looks like a biggie. Hope you recover soon.

As to the wiping issue, set up a drill with a poliching pad on it and reverse slowly onto it. Make sure to take a video so we can all have a laugh though.

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Gio
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#20 Post by Gio » Mon Nov 26, 2012 8:43 am

What gloves were you wearing?

Reason i ask that is my off in 2001 my gloves protected my hands really well there was only localised bruising.
I hate it when people ask if you have a bathroom, I want to say "No we pee in the garden"

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flatlander
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#21 Post by flatlander » Mon Nov 26, 2012 1:26 pm

Richa not quite sure how they got so cut up unless the glove rode up as I took a tour of the carriageways
For the avoidance of doubt and for the benefit of my wife, not everything I may say here will be absolutely true I may on ocassion embellish a little for effect.
That said when it comes to motorbikes, I like to ride side saddle with a nice frock

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Aladinsaneuk
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#22 Post by Aladinsaneuk » Mon Nov 26, 2012 3:07 pm

I have had one of my normal nursey chats with geoff

he's alright :)

thats the main thing


Let's face it, you wouldn't go to a nurse to get good advice on a problem with a Falco - you'd choose an Engineer or a mechanic...


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HowardQ
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#23 Post by HowardQ » Mon Nov 26, 2012 5:40 pm

Really sorry to hear about this Geoff, great timing just before Christmas.
Hope you are soon recovered and the bike is OK.
I'll leave the rear end options with what has been suggested already.
Trouble is nothing much works hands free other than the bidet.
Rear end perched over the bath and a shower head directed from below could be an option with no bidet, a soft brush might also help!
HowardQ

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D-Rider
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#24 Post by D-Rider » Mon Nov 26, 2012 5:52 pm

I Googled "Butt Washer" ......... this is what I found ........

Image

Once your mrs has got her eye in, a quick trip out to the patio should make short work of any lingering chuff-nuts
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Dusty
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#25 Post by Dusty » Mon Nov 26, 2012 7:18 pm

Brilliant, DRider! I even shared that one with Mrs Dusty. However, I'm surprised you didn't offer to bring home one of those all singing all dancing Japanese WCs. Bog and bidet all in one; fantastic!

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flatlander
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#26 Post by flatlander » Mon Nov 26, 2012 8:17 pm

Good newts all and by goat it is that I have just racooned from the fracture clippings and they speyed that

there was a fracture to the left
and a fracture to the right
I'd bust a few rib ribs
But my head bobs were alright
Oh baby
That snot the best views I have three fingers and not of JD but of the bum wiping success variety :smt020

Horse snort I'd snare that whip you :smt007

Ps the quack man he say noggin all good no rot in noggin wood
For the avoidance of doubt and for the benefit of my wife, not everything I may say here will be absolutely true I may on ocassion embellish a little for effect.
That said when it comes to motorbikes, I like to ride side saddle with a nice frock

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randomsquid
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#27 Post by randomsquid » Mon Nov 26, 2012 8:17 pm

Aladinsaneuk wrote:I have had one of my normal nursey chats with geoff

he's alright :)
Must have been a hell of a bang on the head. He was weird as fuck before.
Where ever I lay my hat.....

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Firestarter
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#28 Post by Firestarter » Mon Nov 26, 2012 8:29 pm

'kin hell mate, looks like it could have been a lot worst. Which probably doesn't make you feel a lot better!

Take it easy mate, and if you're really struggling I'm sure Pampers might have a suitable product... :smt002
Aprilia SL1000 Falco '04 in Black & Red

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flatlander
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#29 Post by flatlander » Mon Nov 26, 2012 9:11 pm

randomsquid wrote:
Aladinsaneuk wrote:I have had one of my normal nursey chats with geoff

he's alright :)
Must have been a hell of a bang on the head. He was weird as fuck before.
Now that is funny as fek me and flossie were ripping with laughter about that. Well she was once I took that mask off you left on there
For the avoidance of doubt and for the benefit of my wife, not everything I may say here will be absolutely true I may on ocassion embellish a little for effect.
That said when it comes to motorbikes, I like to ride side saddle with a nice frock

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randomsquid
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#30 Post by randomsquid » Mon Nov 26, 2012 11:01 pm

You be nice to her, remember I want her back.
Where ever I lay my hat.....

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