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When Osama bin Laden died, he was met at the pearly gates
by George Washington, who slapped him across the face and
yelled: "How dare you try to destroy the nation I helped conceive!"

Patrick Henry approached, punched him in the nose and
...shouted: "You wanted to end our liberties but you failed."

James Madison followed, kicked him in the groin and said:
"This is why I allowed our government to provide for the
common defence!"

Thomas Jefferson was next, beat Osama with a long cane
and snarled: "It was evil men like you who inspired me to
write the Declaration of Independence."

The beatings and thrashing continued as George Mason,
James Monroe and 67 other early Americans unleashed
their anger on the terrorist leader.

As Osama lay bleeding and in pain, an angel appeared.
Bin Laden wept and said: "This is not what you promised me."

The angel replied: "I told you there would be 72 Virginians waiting for
you in Heaven. What did you think I said?

Submerged Bin Laden model now ‘most popular aquarium decoration’



A sunken model of the former Al Qaeda leader Osama Bin Laden has proved a hit with aquarium owners who more normally decorate their fish tanks with miniature shipwrecks or little castles. Suppliers have confirmed that the figure, a faithful reproduction rendered in tank safe ceramics and non toxic paint, is outselling many other popular fish tank decorations, including the mermaid and aerating treasure chest.

‘My guppies go mad for Bin Laden’s head’, commented one customer, ‘although I was a little worried that it may risk becoming a shrine for some of the more militant fish.’ The White House has questioned the decision to market an aerating Bin Laden, as this may give the impression that the Al Qaeda leader was still breathing when he was buried at sea. ‘We would prefer patriotic families to decorate their fish tanks with the new model U.S. Navy Seals, which buzz about on the surface rescuing stricken servicemen or presidential poll ratings.’

The sunken Bin Laden model is in the tradition of a whole range of novelty sunken celebrities designed to brighten up tropical fish tanks including Robert Maxwell (for larger tanks), Natalie Wood and Mary Jo Kopenchne who comes in a realistic sunken model of Ted Kennedy’s car. But this latest model has upset some Islamic militants who claim that it demeans the dead leader of Al Qaeda. ‘Nah…’ chuckled one supplier of the ‘Bubbling Bin’; ‘…all them pictures of Osama lying around watching himself on television and dyeing his beard already did that.’