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Walking does more than driving to cause global warming, a leading environmentalist has calculated.

Food production is now so energy-intensive that more carbon is emitted providing a person with enough calories to walk to the shops than a car would emit over the same distance. The climate could benefit if people avoided exercise, ate less and became couch potatoes. Provided, of course, they remembered to switch off the TV rather than leaving it on standby.

The sums were done by Chris Goodall, campaigning author of How to Live a Low-Carbon Life, based on the greenhouse gases created by intensive beef production. “Driving a typical UK car for 3 miles [4.8km] adds about 0.9 kg [2lb] of CO2 to the atmosphere,” he said, a calculation based on the Government’s official fuel emission figures. “If you walked instead, it would use about 180 calories. You’d need about 100g of beef to replace those calories, resulting in 3.6kg of emissions, or four times as much as driving.

“The troubling fact is that taking a lot of exercise and then eating a bit more food is not good for the global atmosphere. Eating less and driving to save energy would be better.”

People should stop wallowing in angst over the physical health of the world and instead make the most of what it has to offer. Live fast, sleep around and die young.

The problem we have is there are too many miserable middle and old aged people who aren't dead!

If more of the energy saving light bulb, vegan, knitted swimming trunks types spent their lives enjoying themselves rather than bitching, whining and trying to juggle facts and figures to solve unsolvable riddles; we'd probably find ourselves in a better place.

Racing motorcycles, BASE jumping and hot-footing it from one brothel to another whilst high on a cocktail of drugs, drink and junk food until one or more of the aforementioned results in a youthful but exhilirating death is the way forward.

Wasting your one life totting up 'carbon-footprint' stats whilst sucking on a lettuce leaf and shouting "DON'T LEAVE THE TV ON STAND-BY" to bemused passers by is rather dull and ultimately pointless.

Please get a grip.

In my expert opinion, I believe that all available scientific evidence points to the existence and activity of humans as the main cause of green house gas generation.

I therefore propose that we should all kill ourselves immediately to avoid causing further damage to the planet. Just everyone remember to put all the TV's off stand by before you kill yourselves.

But hang on, what about the green house gasses produced by our rotting carcasses?

Arrgh! Can't even win in death can we?

Asim Salahuddin, London,

paddyz1 wrote:I am sick to death of hearing about 'carbon footprint' It is the latests buzz word that only the twats who like others to think they are doingin their bit. They want to look good in the eyes of others. They use electricity don't they? Tossers